Back When I Was Pretty and Other More Important Observations
Visited Sissie this weekend and had a marvelous time. She took me out to eat and out shopping–all her treat. We were talking about sewing and decorating. She has made her apartment look like something fit for a design magazine with mostly items from Big Lots. That’s right. You read correctly. She makes everything look beautiful. I don’t think I saw one thing she made herself or even painted. Very unusual. BUT, she’s got a much more demanding job now and is enjoying some instant gratification here and there.
Shopping for clothes! Yes! We went to Ross and a few other places that had super-cute blouses (because I just can’t find pants to fit anymore) at ridiculous prices. She was thinking that sewing to save money is an idea long past, and I had to agree. I want to sew for the fun of it and the control of design and fabric. Problem–when you’ve gained a good bit of weight, it’s much harder to find clothes that fit and look nice. So, discovering that a finished piece of your own sewing just doesn’t fit the bill, then what? Tears?
Sissie turned me on to I Can Make You Thin’s Paul McKenna. Now, this is the same Sissie who “encouraged” me many years ago to join Weight Watchers. I blew her off for at least a year. But, when I finally went to Weight Watchers, I lost 20 pounds and stayed skinny for years. So, although I was skeptical of Paul McKenna, I watched. Well, she also told me to watch, so I was scared not to. It’s a sister thing.
Well, I watched two of his videos that she had recorded, and I have to say…it makes sense. It makes a whole lotta sense. And, frankly? After listening with a semi-open mind, I’m not thinking about my day in terms of food and how to fit my day around eating. Part of his technique is something like aversion therapy. He asked people to imagine some gross things associated with food. What yucks most people out doesn’t do much for me, but to tell you what I pictured might make you never want to eat again. For those of you who are curious, I may reveal my image in another post. But, boy, it is super-sick.
What does this have to do with the title of my post? Back when I was thin and took a great deal more pride in my appearance…..let’s just say it–BEFORE CHILDREN…..I remember reminding myself to pull back from the table and leave food on my plate. I actually did. Now that I’ve let my weight stay on for so long, I’ve forgotten the mind-set. While Sissie and I were out, we saw a couple of ladies behind us with their children. They absolutely defined CUTE. Darling. And, they were all slim and well-dressed. Hard not to sigh and think of yesteryear, you know? One of the women was wearing a printed blouse with a rather unique though not unfamiliar trim, and I couldn’t help pointing it out to Sissie.
Today, I’m back at home in front of my computer perusing my favorite sewing blogs and what do I find? The same trim on a little girl’s dress. The red pom poms. Ta da.
But, it was the post that stopped me in my tracks today. The author’s mother is in ICU and not doing well at all. Judging from the number of people who responded, it shook more than a few other people up as well. It certainly put things in perspective for me. My own mother called me just a little while ago to see how I was doing. She, herself, has been very ill for a while now. I’ve never thought crafting or pretty clothes were frivolous any more than images of nature that please the eye, but I am always aware, especially on days like today, that beauty doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It is ever-present in the people we see it in and the people we share it with.
I truly hope Jennifer’s mother recovers, and I am so thankful that my own mother was able to call me today and laugh about my children’s latest shenanigans. She may not know it or believe it, but she is truly beautiful.
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